How should the bedroom look on the wedding night? via Quora

Answer by Alix Weich Dahlen:

Having been in a bedroom on a wedding night, and many nights after that, I can offer a couple of suggestions, but they are all just my opinion and you’re welcome to disagree.

Most people think of romantic room as having rose petals on the bed, lit only by candle light, some soft music playing, a bottle of champagne on ice, and two glasses. I don’t entirely agree.

The rose petals on the bed thing is classic romantic imagery, but in real life I found it to be a terrible nuisance. You have to either get rose petals stuck places you don’t want them, or take the time to knock them all into the floor, which can be a bit of a mood killer. Also the next day you have a room full of dead brown flower petals. As far as decorating the bed itself, I would recommend having the bed made nearly, with blankets and things made out of comfortable, soft materials that feel good on your skin.

I also am not overly fond of candles. Candle light is very flattering, that’s true, but it’s also a lot of fuss. You have to have enough candles to light the room adequately, which is quite a lot of candles. That results in having to find a lot of safe places to put candles where they won’t set the curtains or anything else on fire, or get knocked over by people in the bed. Having your bed/hair catch fire is also a real mood killer. Also, if you light the candles in advance, many will burn down or go out before you get there, and if you take the time to walk around lighting 50 candles, that can kill any romantic tension between the people.

If you have a light on a dimmer, you can achieve the same “mood lighting” effect much more simply. Also having smaller lamps that you can turn on selectively to get the lighting you want is great.

You don’t want it to be so dark you can’t see each other, or your partner will look like this:

That’s a good way to have a lot of awkward “Where are you?” Moments.

On the other hand, too bright of lighting may make a more shy person feel extra self conscious, so avoid lighting like this:

You will want to go with a light level more in this range:

Music is usually good, because it gives a person who may be feeling self conscious something to focus on other than if their making weird noises. Just keep in mind that people naturally move to the rhythm of music.

Champagne or some other beverage is a fine thing to have. People get thirsty. Also if you have something that comes in a nice bottle it can add to the overall niceness of the rooms image.

If you insist on rose petals, I’d put them on the floor leading to the bed, or leave them on the roses and decorate the room with vases of flowers.

Best of luck!

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